The Golf Ball Rollback

Golf Digest just published an article saying that the proposed golf ball rollback for professional tours might backfire. In time, a small number of elite golfers might figure out how to get their swing speed high enough to negate the changes in the ball.

By getting their swing speed up to 140+ mph, a few professional golfers could hit the shorter ball up to 350 yards. Everyone else would be left in the dust.

One solution would be to use course design and setup to penalize wayward drives more than is done now. That’s kind of expensive, though.

David Feherty once suggested making the ball bigger, which is known to cut down on how far it flies.

All this is guesswork. Leave it to The Recreational Golfer to come up with a foolproof solution: the exploding golf ball.

We would require a golf ball design that makes the ball disintegrate when struck at a swing speed of greater than, say, 135 mph.

BOOM! Cloud of dust! Tee up another, podner, you’re hitting two.

Not only would it solve the distance problem, it would be widely entertaining. Can you imagine the cheering? And the little cloud of white dust rising up over the tree tops from the number seven tee that you can see from way over at number 14?

And Jim Nantz saying, “Oops! Got another one!”

And think of the pressure on the guys with the big guns! Not, am I going to hit the fairway, but, is my golf ball going to blow up?

And Tour golf on TV, which has become about as boring as competitive cornhole, would become as popular a TV sport as any. Even more than World’s Strongest Man competitions.

Problems solved. You’re welcome.

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I hope this mildly amusing post has entertained you and taken your mind off, for a while, the impending debt limit crisis. (I just had to say that.)

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